Our country has failed to take action to protect American lives yet again. The global pandemic has disproportionately impacted black and brown communities, and as the country begins reopening, we have witnessed even more truly horrific and senseless murders and violence against black lives. Like many, I feel small and incapable of change. I have hesitated to write this, or post on social media, feeling overwhelmed by the enormity of the systemic injustices contributing to these issues. I have questioned, who am I to say something? What would saying something do anyway? It is the longstanding silence and inaction that lets this continue. Even though it is difficult, I have to use my voice and my privilege. This blog may not be the ideal forum, but I have to say something somewhere.
As I walked my dog after the Oakland curfew last night, I felt terror about the police and violence around me. I very quickly checked my privilege – I am a young white woman walking a white fluffy dog. I am not going to be a target. My heart broke upon the repeated realization that black and brown people are targets in ways I never have to feel, and it is a sign of my extraordinary privilege that I only fleetingly feel fear of the police. Especially after seeing the video of the woman in Central Park who weaponized race to target an innocent black man, I recognize inherently that I am part of the problem. My ancestors created this system. I am committed to doing the work to be part of reconciliation and progress.
I feel sadness, anger, grief, guilt, and outrage. I’m tired and overwhelmed and emotionally drained. I also recognize that my privilege shields me from so much of the pain and suffering black and brown communities feel, where there is more hurt, more desperation, more exhaustion. I see how devastating it is for our president to value things over lives; how hurtful it is for the media to criticize methods of protest; how scary it is not to be protected by the police; but instead to be targeted. I can only imagine the hurt that I do not see, that my privilege continues to protect me from.
Although I couldn’t possibly write this without briefly gesturing to the pervasive and chronic suffering people of color experience, I know that it is not my place to claim others’ pain. Instead, I hope to listen and learn, as well as share my perspective of identifying and claiming my white privilege. I can do better; I can be better.
How?
First, I’m listening to black and brown voices and learning to check my biases and assumptions. Because it is not the responsibility of my black friends and colleagues to educate me, I’m reading books, listening to podcasts, and watching documentaries. I’m humbly and nondefensively welcoming ideas on how I can become more self-aware and improve. I’m informing myself on how to best be an ally and an advocate. Some books that I have appreciated include:
Part of listening and learning means holding up nuance. This means appreciating that my truth is not the only truth. This means celebrating progress made and simultaneously shouting that it isn’t good enough. This means condemning police brutality and demanding police accountability while promoting positive examples of community policing. This means sharing diverse and complex stories of people of color, stories of suffering, and of thriving and of frivolity.
Second, I’m taking action to support. As a white person, I’ve found it helpful to pull from resources like these to identify actions like supporting black-owned businesses, boycotting companies notorious for exploiting prison labor, and increasing representation of diverse voices. I’m just getting started and am on the lookout for more ways to get involved, and wanted to share some of these resources for those interested:
Third, I’m giving what I can. As a graduate student, I can’t offer a lot financially, but there are so many organizations doing excellent work that could use additional support. Here are just a few: #blacklivesmatter, National Council for Incarcerated and Formerly Incarcerated Women and Girls, NAACP, Southern Poverty Law Center, United Negro College Fund, Black Youth Project 100, Color of Change, The Sentencing Project, Families against Mandatory Minimums, A New Way of Life, and Dream Defenders.
And finally, I’m using my voice. Although I’m listening and learning first, I also want to use my privilege to call attention to what is happening and amplify black and brown voices. I can use my voice to advocate for change. I also hope to model speaking out, doing the work, and learning from my mistakes. To the black and brown communities who have suffered so greatly, the least I can do is speak up and say I see you, your life matters, and I am with you.
No comments:
Post a Comment